Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Reset Your Life Day 7

Life Narrative "Aha" Moment

This exercise was something I would have never done otherwise. It's almost silly for me to write this in my cramped apartment, my neighbor's salsa music banging under my feet and Papi knocked out on the couch beside me from working 3rd and 1st shifts back to back. I mean, the life I described is a far cry from my current situation, so the thought crosses my mind to not even risk it. Almost like I'm afraid I might jinx myself if I actually put on paper things I have held secretly in my heart for so long. What will people who know me say about my "big" dreams (it's always the ones that THINK they know you)? They may poke, prod and crush my dreams before they even take root in my spirit. So, I daydream about what could be being careful not to dream too large fearing I might actually start believing myself. What if I accomplish something no one ever expected of me... then what? Will this set a standard I can't live up to?

Well this time I threw all these thoughts to the wind and wrote from the depths of me. All those secret yearnings, missed opportunities and hopes for MY life. Not the life my parents would have me live, not the life my family thinks I should live, not the life my community expects me to live but the life I was meant to live! Inside I found a woman who had been waiting for me. She was warm, beautiful, loving and most importantly FREE.

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